Get Your Shots!
We are most impressionable and feel the most need for approval when we are children. When you were a child if you didn’t feel valued, didn’t get much praise, were never celebrated, never felt protected, nurtured, important, special, smart, capable, talented, trusted, beautiful or handsome and loved then that all may have taken a toll on you and slid into your adult life. And unfortunately, those are scars that you will never be able to hide. Whenever we lack self-esteem it will show up somewhere, at sometime in our lives.
If as a child you were never forgiven for any thing you did, you may grow up to be a very unforgiving person and always critical or judgmental of others. However, there is a way to fix those issues within you. You may feel angry and have some deep-rooted guilt or resentment about something or someone. That is understandable given what you may have gone through as a child; However, don’t try to pretend that everything is alright with you, when it isn’t. Own your feelings, give yourself permission to feel the hurt and pain. It is when you try to suppress those feelings that you begin to broil like a pot of hot water. You try to cover it up by putting a lid on the boiling pot, but eventually what’s inside the pot will start to over flow all over the stove making a big mess! Yet, you remain feeling tortured, like holding in your scream while someone is plucking out your eyelashes one by one. Ouch!
When you don’t allow yourself to express your feelings you are only becoming disconnected from yourself. Sort of like you’ve become a zombie…purely animated without any feelings. Your feelings whatever they may be are totally valid and if you hurt then allow yourself to hurt. Then you need to learn how to get deeper into the root of the pain to find out where it all originated from and work on healing it. It is always good to become your own doctor and take the time to examine yourself every so often. Once you take the time to do that you can set the standards of how you want to live your life and live life on your own terms; but you must make an agreement with yourself to love yourself and love yourself enough to know that it is deserved.
To avoid the cycle spreading to your child/children so that they grow up with a healthy feeling of self-worth, they should be given a shot of self-esteem. You should be giving your child/children several doses of love, doses of encouragement, a dose of trust, a dose of protection, a variety of doses that include letting them know how special they are, how talented, how smart, how important and how valued they are. If you find they may need an extra dose of one of the various self-esteem shots, then give it to them and even show them how to inject themselves. They will grow up to be healthier adults from it.
So, the next time your child comes face to face with the feeling of self-doubt or someone tries to infect them with their negative germs. They won’t need to worry about catching any of those germs, because they’ve already had their shots.