Watch Your Tongue
Ouch! That hurts! Are you aware that some people are very good at using a razor blade with a smile? The words that come out of their mouth is so smooth, so sweet and so soft spoken, that it may take you a moment to realize you’ve been cut! While you are standing there bleeding, or maybe hemorrhaging, they are putting the razor blade away while asking you “What’s the matter, sweetie?” Most times the person is speaking the truth, but speaking the truth is not what this is about! How the truth gets told is what this is about. Because a sweet, gentle, smiling razor blade is still a razor blade!
The majority of people are open to hearing the truth when it is said in a way they can hear it. Yet, no one wants to hear you when you make them out to be wrong, or when you attack their weaknesses. People don’t hear what you are saying if you are saying it to make yourself look better than they are. Don’t in anyway make the mistake of thinking that the people you speak to do not know what you really mean. They do! If there is an ounce of judgment, criticism, or degrading in what you say, they are not going to hear you. Matter-of-fact they are going to totally tune you out!
If you want to make sure that people hear you talk about difficult or uncomfortable situations, you must speak to them from your heart. Yes, you must be real and honest, but you must speak to them with compassion and concern. Maybe you feel the need to finally confront that friend you feel only comes around when they want something. Maybe you have a young adult child that has been walling out lately and you need to have a good heart to heart to get them back on track. Pretend you are their teacher, their healer or the person that will lead them to the next level of spiritual and emotional growth. I know it can be a little challenging sometimes, especially when you are talking with teens or young adults. Yet, you want to be sure they really hear what you are trying to convey to them and are not just listening.
In order to make that work, maybe you can test your approach out on yourself, by telling yourself some truth about yourself that is difficult for you to hear. Then once you have figured out how to speak more lovingly toward yourself, you will be able to throw out the razor blade and begin speaking in a more loving tone to others.