People don’t change because you want them to

love-untamed-spicedupcrapWhy is it when we get into a relationship we are always trying to change the other person. You be looking for the changes and never see them coming. That is a sign that you need to stop looking for them to change. You are with the person you are with because you choose them. You need to stop looking for something else and see the love in whom you are with.

You chose this person and you chose them because at one time they opened your heart. You also chose them for exactly who they are and how they sounded at the time. Don’t keep checking to see if they are going to change, just because you may have changed.

By asking your partner to change to what you consider your reality, you are asking that they ignore their own. When you are looking for, checking for or demanding they change, that is not loving, that is controlling! It’s not love when you expect someone to change just because you want them to or you think they should. Love allows us to see and hear the best of what we have right now. The love within us grows, when we grow. It shifts as we shift.

Stop checking to see if they are going to change into what you knew they weren’t. See who this is. Hear what they say. Accept what they do as the truth of who they are and look for the love in them. If who you have no longer meets your needs, then choose again, but don’t make the one in the now suffer because they are being who they are and not who you want them to be.

Put aside your demands and start looking for and embracing the things you love about who your partner is right now, because, people don’t change because you want them to.

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1 Comment

  1. Concentrate on what you fell in love with.

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