Don’t Take It Personal
I am the type of person that can enjoy my own company. It may seem boring to others, but I don’t have a problem saying no. If I don’t want to do something I won’t do it. I’ve never been one that conforms to the liking of others in order to fit it in or appease. So, when someone I love dearly asked me at the last minute to attend a trip and there was a certain reason why they wanted me along, I declined the offer. Was the person upset with my decision? Yes. Yet, I thought the issue was over and done with.
It wasn’t until attending a cookout and that someone whom I love dearly flipped out on me (in front of everyone), that I realize it wasn’t over for them. It was surprising for me to see that person act that way, but after analyzing the issue, I figured out why, which helped me not to take the situation too personal. Did it hurt my feelings? Yes. Did it change the dynamics of our relationship? Yes. Yet, I am ok with it because I realize that rarely do people do things because of you. They do things because of them. So even when it seems personal, it probably isn’t.
Granted, it’s hard to not take something someone does to you and it is totally out of their character personally. But, it happens. Could it be in order for them to hold on to another, they have allowed that person to control their being? Have they allowed them to control their feelings, thoughts and behavior? After I accessed the situation and what was really going on, I still didn’t feel bad about telling them no, but I was upset that the person had allowed someone else to take control of their behavior, which caused our relationship to somewhat fall apart. I still love and will always love the person to my death, but we will never have the close bond we once shared ever again and that is the reality of it that saddens me the most.
The point here is and what you should take away from this, is if ever you find yourself feeling angry, hurt or victimized by the actions of another you should find within yourself some place deep within that helps you to understand just how much pain that person must be in. Yet you must try to understand how burdened their soul must be and how hardened they must be in their heart in order for them to behave in a way that is truly out of alignment with their own integrity.
However, believe it or not, there is a gigantic feeling of freedom that comes to you when you wish them well and just don’t take it personal.