“I Know I am Learning Something!”
Nothing in life happens passively. We are completely responsible for every experience we have, because we determine how we will respond. Yes, sometimes we get stuck in the “Why me?” mode. Life has a way of asking, why not you? If you happen to be in the “I can’t help myself” mode you are available, that’s why! Unfortunately, we believe we become victims as a result of what happens, when in fact; believing we are victims enables things to happen.
It may seem right now that someone has done something very bad to you. Maybe a situation occurred where they may have placed you as a scapegoat for something that had gone wrong and in front of everyone they threw you under the bus. It may strike you that this is unfair; that you don’t deserve it; or that it is just downright wickedness on their part. You are probably angry or hurt, or perhaps afraid of what others may think of you because of what they’ve done. You may not understand how or why this has happened. And all of this and more may be true about what you feel right now. However, no matter how bad it hurts or how bad you feel, you are not a victim!
Before you get angry with someone for what they have done, not done, or are doing to you, honestly ask yourself, “What role did I play in this?” Before you get angry or dismiss the question, honestly ask yourself, Did I say yes when I wanted to say no? Did I say no when I really wanted to say yes? Did I really trust this person? Did I go into the situation in doubt? In fear? Before you start beating up on yourself or anyone else, honestly ask yourself, when did I see this before? When was the last time I was in this place? Feeling this way? Before you give yourself a headache, say something you will be sorry for later, or slump into depression or anger, honestly ask yourself, “What is the lesson here?”
Always remember, no matter what is going on in your life, it is your responsibility to choose how you respond. This does not mean you will not hurt. It doesn’t translate to you that you should ignore what you feel. Not being a victim and taking responsibility means: feel the pain, realize the shock, look for the lesson, and keep on moving in a way that honors who you really are. You are having a temporary human experience. Your experiences may knock you down, but it is your responsibility not to let them keep you down.