A Ball of Confusion

Often, when people upset us or hurt us, it is usually because there was no agreement. Let’s face it, agreements give clarity. They bring about order and understanding. Agreements are an important element of success. Without an agreement, you can be thinking one thing while the other person has a completely different idea. In the end, you may have both lived up to your agreement; however, there was no clarity on what the agreement was about.

Let’s take Vanessa and Jeffrey who have been seeing each other for just about 4 months. They would text each other constantly throughout the day and talk on the phone all night, “you hang up, no you hang up” nightly phone calls. They had a lot in common in the way of life and the bond between the two of them was as if they knew each other all their lives. Then out of the blue Jeffrey stopped texting and calling, he even stopped responding to Vanessa’s messages and calls, only to leave Vanessa to wonder what was going on. Well, she soon found out, Jeffrey started entertaining other people leaving Vanessa out in the cold. It wasn’t that Jeffrey didn’t like Vanessa, he liked her very much, he just didn’t have the guts to let her know that he was trying to have his cake and eat it too. Of course, Vanessa was upset when she found out, but not so much at Jeffrey as she was at herself because frankly, there was no clarity as to what their agreement was regarding her and Jeffrey relationship. Jeffrey eventually apologized, and Vanessa forgave him so that she could move on.

Agreements are important when we are living together, working together, or just trying to get someplace together. Agreements must be clear and spoken rather than implied. Agreements must also be respected. There must be a meeting of the minds that everyone can live with. Agreements must also be honored. All who agree must keep their word to do what they say they will do. When there is no agreement, those who are coming together can expect to accomplish only a few things: a few hard feelings and a ball of confusion.

 #confusion,  #relationships, #agreement, #playerfromthehimalia, #honesty, #communication, #dating, #clarity, #movingon, #IyanlaVanzant

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